hello again

I disappeared from the blogging world for a while now but I'm baaaack! I'm going to try to get back into the habit of keeping up... if nothing else it's great for memories sake!

A few things are different in our lives since last time time I was here. The major changes that come to mind are that I am now a fully affiliated Bradley Method(R) Natural Childbirth Educator and... now we have a toddler! I can't believe my baby girl is already so close to 2! Needless to say, life is full of fun and adventure as we juggle work, other work (even though I love what I do, it's still time away from the fam!), keeping up with the house (which seems to be a never-ending feat), and of course, spending time with my sweet family!

WHAT'S ON MY MIND TODAY:

--Trying to schedule/organize my next childbirth class(es)...
We're nearing the end of my current series which is exciting because that means we're getting close to meeting new babies! It's always a bit sad for me though to release my little butterflies off on their own. I know they will do well though so it's mostly just exciting.
The end of one series means the beginning of another which is fun. I get to meet new couples and every group is different. It's a little stressful at this time though because I have no clue how many people are going to end up in a series until the last minute. And when I say "last minute", I mean sometimes the day of the first class! Anyhoo, it's an exciting time so I'm looking forward to it.

--This house is making me crazy...
I've been in major cleaning mode lately but there is just so much to do, I feel like it will never be complete. Pintrest has been a big help lately - full of ideas for cleaning, organizing, etc. I've probably only done less than 1% of the things I have pinned but I would venture to guess I'm not the only one.
Now if only there was a magic solution to dog hair!!! Geez, I love Edward but sometimes I want to go back in time and slap my past self for not thinking about the massive shedding ahead when we adopted him and they said "he's part husky". Oh well.

--The thing that's always on my mind...
When will A get to be a big sister?!?! I know, I know, I know, "it's all in God's timing". I try so hard to remind myself of that and I will myself to be patient but patience has never been my strong suit. I try to convince myself that it's better not to have another one right now anyway for this arbitrary reason or that one but it's hard to trick yourself. Especially since we had a miscarriage back in March. That was a really tough time for me emotionally and it's just very difficult not to know if/when we'll be blessed with more babies. I know the fact that we're still breastfeeding can affect my fertility but she doesn't nurse very often anymore and we've night-weaned. Plus, I know so many people that have gotten pregnant while breastfeeding (and even nursed throughout their whole pregnancies) so it's frustrating to feel like I'm supposed to chose between A's nutrition/well-being/happiness and having another baby.

Besides the fact that I just always wanted 3 or 4 children, I really want A to have siblings to play with. I know she would be such a great little helper and she would love a brother/sister to pieces! The Hubs is ready for another one, too. We both have been for quite some time. I think that makes it even harder sometimes because we're TO THAT!" but instead I usually politely respond with the ole, "Whenever the Lord decides to bless us with another one.". Plus, I teach pregnant couples every week! I love it, but sometimes it's really hard to be surrounded by what I want but don't not not having another baby yet because we aren't ready or for a lack of trying. It's just not happening. Another thing that makes it hard is that people are always asking, "When are you having another one?". In my head I'm screaming, "TRUST ME, I'D LOVE TO KNOW THE ANSWER have.

I know I'm not the first person to feel this way and I know things could be much worse, I'm not trying to have a pity party here by any means, I'm just being honest. It's tough when you're ready for something to happen but things are out of your control. Anyway, J & I have agreed on a timeframe so if we aren't pregnant by [a certain date] then we will figure out where to go from there. In the mean time I'm planning to work on being as healthy as I can with a healthy diet, exercise, and getting my spine in alignment at the chiropractor.

--Planning a birthday party...
I'm starting a little early but I'm just excited to celebrate my precious girl's birthday! I've already created her birthday invitations and I did a pretty good job for someone who's not necessarily very creative. I have some other ideas (thanks again, Pintrest) for decorations and party favors that I'm going to make, too. Surely I'll have time to get it all done in the next three months. I am so excited for October!

OK, well, it's been fun catching up.
Laters baby ;)

xoxo,
C